Addicted to Massages

Hello. My name is Ginger. I am an addict. I am addicted to massages.

It started when I was teaching at Virginia College, and I could get an hour-long massage for $20. Hardly a Saturday passed that didn’t find me at the college’s massage therapy suite.

When that job went away, so did the $20 massages, but I found Massage Envy. For the next 3 years, I belonged to their “club”. I signed up for monthly massages at a huge discount. There are a couple of “catches”. One is that they are paid by automatic withdrawal from your debit card or your credit card, and the second is that you have to agree to do this for a pre-determined time. I think it is a year.

Anyway, I enjoyed a monthly massage for the next 3 years. But by then I had retired from work, and no longer had time to go over there every month. So, a year later (by then about 4 years of membership), I told them I was stopping my membership. They said I was already paid for that month (I think it was October of 2015 at that point), and that I had already paid for 8 massages I hadn’t collected yet, but would forfeit if I didn’t collect them by the end of the month, when my membership ended. So, since they are open day and night until 9:00, and 7 days a week, I managed to get over there on Sunday nights, Wednesday afternoons, and other odd times to get my 8 massages in during the next 3 weeks.

Oh, how I missed them! But for the next 3 Christmases, my son gave me Massage Envy gift cards, because he knew how much I missed it. About one or two a year was all I really had time for anyway, so this was the perfect gift for me.

Well imagine my surprise last weekend, when I stopped for gas and the pump declined my debit card! I tried twice, knowing there was some mistake, because even with one check that hadn’t cleared yet, I had way more in the bank than gas was going to cost. So I checked my bank app. To my (extreme) surprise, I was $300 overdrawn. IMPOSSIBLE. So I looked at the account to see what the hell happened. There was a debit from MASSAGE ENVY for almost $900.

Standing agape at my cell phone at the pump, with an almost empty gas tank, I called Massage Envy to see wtf. After talking to several people, and after finally getting someone who knew what was going on, I was told that I never “officially” ended my club membership, so I owed for the last 3 years, and they had debited my account for the $896. I was BEYOND angry, because I was helpless to correct this until Monday. (Thank goodness I have an old-fashioned savings account, and can auto-transfer into checking.)

But I wanted to know more about how this happened in the first place. The debit card I had when I registered for Massage Envy’s club had long since expired, so how in the world did they get access to my bank account??? And WHY, if I was still a "member", they hadn't continued to debit my account 3 years ago??? Then, I could have known they hadn't "officially" cancelled my account, and could have nipped this in the bud.

THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART: Massage Envy Corporate has developed a “bot” that searches old accounts that haven’t been “officially” cancelled in writing, or for which they have no piece of paper with a signature ending the account. Once identified, the bot searches these accounts for bank account information, and debit them for however many years in arrears they are. The lady I talked to at Massage Envy said the manager had spent the whole last week explaining this to the numerous people who called and complained all day.

I am told I can get the total amount back, but first I have to go in and sign an agreement to cancel my account that was cancelled 3 years ago. They can reverse the charge in 3 to 5 business days.

So, MASSAGE ENVY, here is my message to you: I will NEVER AGAIN darken your doorstep. If my son wants to give me a massage gift card for Christmas, I will give him a list of the MYRIAD other spas and individuals around me that offer therapeutic massage just as satisfying and comforting as Massage Envy. I wouldn’t be surprised if there didn’t pop up a “class action suit” against them for this. Although I’ve never sued anyone in my life, given the opportunity, I will enthusiastically hop onto THAT train!

AAAAALLLLL ABOARD!!

Buying a New Bible

“Although it is impossible to obtain exact figures, there is little doubt that the Bible is the world's best-selling and most widely distributed book. A survey by the Bible Society concluded that around 2.5 billion copies were printed between 1815 and 1975, but more recent estimates put the number at more than 5 billion.”  - Guinness World Records.

I haven’t bought a new Bible in several years. In fact, I still have the Bible I was given when I joined the church at age 12. In addition to that one, I also have several little green Gideon editions of the New Testament/Psalms/Proverbs I got when I was in the army, and a little white Gideon edition I was given when I graduated from Nursing School. These miniature KJVs travel with me. One stays in my overnight bag, one in my glove compartment, and one in my suitcase. I admit that after almost 50 years, they are not worn out. I guess I don’t read the Bible much when I’m traveling, but they’re available if I want to.

The 10-year-old Bible I use day-to-day IS worn out. In fact, I wear out a Bible about every 15 years. My current Bible is all dog-eared, and many verses are highlighted in pink or yellow. Lots of pages have notes written across the margins, underlined passages with asterisks by them, and the inside front cover is filled with notes about what various pastors or speakers have said, or quotes I like, or ideas that came to me.  I have stuffed bookmarks, 4-leaf clovers, cards and notes in it. I usually have a pen clipped in it, so I can make more notes if needed. My Bible (study) is a “work in progress”.

This Bible actually would have lasted another 10 years, if Luke through Revelation hadn’t fallen out of it.  The whole chunk of most of the New Testament – just slid right out. A Bible without the New Testament isn’t really a Bible to me. I did think about sticking the chunk back in the Bible, and getting a wide rubber band to hold it all together, but what a hassle that would be, every time I want to read it, or to stuff another bookmark in it! Not to mention that every time I open it, the New Testament drops out again.

I can’t order a Bible online. I have to hold it to see if it’s the right size and weight. I have to look in it to see if the print is too small, if the pages are too thin to make notes in the margins without bleeding through, and I always read certain passages to see if the particular translation is acceptable. While some of these passages will never replace the KJV in my mind, I don’t want the whole Bible’s language to be so antiquated I can’t easily understand it.  So, for me, buying a new Bible is a complicated and precise process.

The last Bible I bought was from the LifeWay store in Trussville. I worked near there, and spent my lunch hours  for almost a week browsing every Bible that was not packaged up so I couldn’t open it. Now I live behind Barnes & Noble, so I decided to start there. Surprise! B & N has almost as many Bibles as LifeWay. 

I won’t bore you with the little details, but after 3.5 hours of holding and scanning and comparing almost every Bible at B & N, I picked the perfect new Bible. The print is large enough for me to read. The translation is actually the same as my current Bible, and Land o’ Goshen! It has lines in the margins for notes! It is slightly smaller than my current Bible, even with the New Testament intact. It does lack the ancient biblical maps in the back, but I don’t look at those much anyway. It is soft cover, and I’ve never had a soft cover Bible before, so this one will be unique in my Bible collection.

So up to the counter I went with it. “That will be $64.98.” Hmmm… Since it doesn’t have pure gold inlay, I hope it at least cooks supper. But my question is: who and where are the 5 billion people who can afford to buy a Bible? I’m guessing they’re not Hollywood or sports stars… so who??

Random Acts of Kindness

We celebrate/commemorate a lot in February: Valentine’s Day, Wear Red Day (heart disease awareness), Mardi Gras and Ash Wednesday, Presidents Day, Black History Month, Groundhog Day… and snuggled right there between Chinese New Year and Drink Wine Day is Random Acts of Kindness Day.

 “Celebrated on February 17th each and every year, Random Acts of Kindness Day is when everyone has the opportunity to do something nice for a complete stranger, a family member or a coworker.” (Random Acts of Kindness Foundation)

Yes. There is a Random Acts of Kindness Foundation. In fact, the RAKF celebrates Random Acts of Kindness WEEK. In the under-acclaimed movie “Pay It Forward”, a 7^th grade Social Studies teacher assigns his class to devise and implement a plan that will change the world for the better. One student’s plan is to do a good deed for someone, and then ask the recipient of the deed to “pay it forward” by doing 3 good deeds for others, who request that each of those 3 pay it forward to 3 more, ultimately causing an unending ripple of good deeds. Since it IS a movie, of course some of the good deeds backfire. But in the end, like a Hallmark Christmas movie, everyone finds love and lives happily ever after.

Mr. Webster tells us “random” means “proceeding, made, or occurring without definite aim, reason, or pattern”, so the deeds in the movie don’t fit the definition of “random”. But random or intentional, kindness is contagious. Studies have shown that when a person does an act of kindness for someone else, that kindness unfolds, like a ripple on a pond. ANY act of kindness matters.

When I speak to you of kindness, I realize that many people reading this are "the choir". Many of you donate time, money, and energy to specific deeds and events that are kind, helpful, and even life-sustaining. Today I’m thinking about kindness from a little different perspective when I specify RANDOM (occurring without definite aim, reason, or pattern).

Biblically, the Good Samaritan is the ultimate example of doing random acts of kindness. The Samaritan came upon a man on the side of the road, who had been beaten, robbed, and left half dead. Expecting NOTHING – not even a  “thanks” – the Samaritan bound the injured dude’s wounds, and THEN obtained and paid for his extended rehabilitative care. Random acts of kindness.

According to the RAFK, “… the original construct (of random acts of kindness) implies a level of anonymity … that seems to have been lost.” That means that many people might perform acts of kindness, but they expect (at a minimum) recognition or thanks, making the acts not random at all, but intentional. Consider some of these totally random acts you might have performed, or had done to/for you: In heavy traffic, someone slowed and let you merge. Someone at Aldi’s gave you a grocery cart, and refused your quarter. Someone dropped a coin in your expired parking meter. Someone took the mayonnaise and opened that sealed lid for you. A stranger admired your blouse or your tie. When you got to the Starbuck’s window, someone had already paid for your coffee.  Someone at the grocery store reached up and got a can off the top shelf for you. While you were away for the weekend, someone put your newspapers on the porch.

The possibilities are endless! I’m proposing each of us perform some random act of kindness every day for the next YEAR. If you can’t do that, then an intentional act of kindness will suffice. Remember the ripple effect. If everyone did one act of kindness every day, just imagine what the world would be like a year from now!

I’ll start: Whoever you are, and wherever you are, I wish for you a day filled with joy and peace!

Your turn.